THE DEAF WIFE AND THE CONCERNED HUSBAND

A man feared that his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family doctor to discuss the problem. The doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

“Here’s what you do,” said the doctor, “stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.”

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den. He said to himself, “I’m about 40 feet away, let’s see what happens.” Then in a normal tone he asked, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” No response.

So the husband moved closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he was about 20 feet from his wife and asked, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Again he gets no response.

So, he walked up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Again there is no response.

So he walked right up behind her. “Honey, what’s for dinner?” 

“Ralph, for the fifth time I’ve said, chicken!”

 Source: As told in Cathy L. Wray, The Perfect Blend Devotional
(WestBow Press, 2014) pages 147-148

CONSIDER THIS

The problem may not be with the other one as we always think. It could be very much within us. We sometimes tend to look to heal in others problems or issues that are actually ours.

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I STILL RECOGNIZE HER

The husband knew he could not adequately care for his wife, now in the final stages of Alzheimer’s. He found a compassionate facility, and visited her every day. At noon for lunch.

Not 11:59.
Not 12:01.
Noon. Every day.

Until the day of a minor accident when he found himself in an Emergency Room, his arm being stitched by a nurse as the clock approached the noon hour.

“I need to leave,” he said ill at ease.

“Hold on,” she told him, “we’re not finished here.”

“But I must visit my wife at noon,” he said.

“Well,” she told him gently, “today you can be a little late.”

The man told the nurse the story of his wife and of the facility where she lives and how when he visits she does not even recognize him, does not know who he is. The nurse patted his hand and said, “That’s okay hon. You can relax. If she doesn’t even recognize you, there is no harm in being late this one day.”

“No,” the man insisted. “I need to go. I need to be there at noon. I know she doesn’t recognize me. But I need to be there because I still recognize her.”

Source | as told by Terry Hershey

PONDER AND CONSIDER

Real integrity is doing the right thing, knowing that nobody’s going to know whether you did it or not. |  Oprah Winfrey

Our character is what we do when we think no one is watching. | H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

For your pursuit of being the best basketball player possible, you should always assume someone is watching and act accordingly. | John Wooden

  • How would your behaviour change if you were no longer recognized?
  • What would you do if no one was watching?

HOW NOT TO COMMUNICATE

A man who wanted to work on his communication skills with his wife, someone he loved dearly and whom he didn’t want to lose, went to the bookstore and purchased a couple of books on communication.  He read them and a few other ebooks he downloaded free  from the internet. He then handed all of them to his wife and said, “Here. Read these. I’m not going to talk to you until you do.”

Source | unknown

PONDER AND CONSIDER

A little bit of knowledge is a dangerous thing.

ASKING FOR A PUSH

It’s 3 a.m. and Maurice and Golda are woken up by a loud banging on their front door. Mamice gets up and opens the door to a drunken stranger standing in the pouring rain. “Can I have a push?” says the drunk.

“No you can’t,” says Maurice, “it’s three o’clock in the moming. Please go away, you’ll wake the children.”

Maurice shuts the door and goes back to bed.

“Who was that?” asks Golda.

“Just some drunk, dear, asking for a push,” Maurice replies.

“So did you help him?” Golda asks.

“No I didn’t. It’s 3 a.m. and it’s pouring rain,” replies Maurice.

Golda says, “Shame on you, Maurice. Have you already forgotten when our car broke down about six months ago and those two men helped us? I think you should help the man outside.”

So Maurice reluctantly does as he is told. He gets dressed, goes out into the pouring rain and calls out, “Hello, are you still there?”

“Yes,” comes back the answer.

“Do you still need a push?” Maurice shouts.

“Yes, please!” comes the reply from the dark.

“So where are you?” asks Maurice.

“Over here on the swing,” replies the drunk.

Source | David Minkoff,   Jewish Jokes: A Clever Kosher Compilation

PONDER AND CONSIDER

People will continue to need a push in life from time to time. We may resist at first, making all kinds of excuses. We may give the push for the wrong reason or because we have received a push from someone else ourselves. And when we do in fact decide to go and offer a helping hand we may discover we have been taken for a ride! Then what?

  • What motivates you to help others?

JUST FOUR PILLS

After visiting the doctor, a man called his wife, crying.
His wife asked, “What’s the matter honey?”
He said, “Well, the doctor has given me these pills, and I have to take one each day for the rest of my life.”
And his wife asked, “So why are you upset?”
He answered, “The doctor only gave me  four pills.”

 

Source | Based on Paul Coutinho sj, HOW BIG IS YOUR GOD.  Page 107

 PONDER AND CONSIDER

To live fully and freely we need to accept the transitoriness of life.  It is all impermanent.  We are just passing through.  Life is a constant flux.  Everything is constantly changing.

 

WRONG EMAIL ADDRESS

A couple were going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip.

The husband went ahead to the destination first and his wife would meet him the next day.

When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email.

Unfortunately, when typing her address, he mistyped a letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher’s wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.

When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,

Just got checked in.  Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here!

PONDER AND CONSIDER

Miscommunication, conscious or unconscious, intended or unintended, can in fact shift the whole tenor of a conversation and deform what could have been a vacation with a taste of paradise into a dreaded visit that tastes and feels like hell!